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Lead with Your Strengths
If you like this article:
Psychologists are discovering that human strengths act as buffers against suffering and ineffective action in the world: Strengths such as:
- Optimism
- Courage
- Interpersonal skills
- Future – mindedness
- Faith
- Work ethic
- Hope
- Honesty
- Perseverance
- The capacity for flow
- Insight
- ... to name several.
Much of the task remaining is to understand and learn how to foster these strengths and virtues in all people – young and old.
The acquisition or possession of certain competencies, strengths, positive characteristics, or resilience factors are the elements that lead to developmental trajectories of well-being. These then become the appropriate focus for personal development programs that seek to increase the experience of a life well lived. These personal strengths produce optimal development and support conditions that produce happiness, gratification, well being, and the good and meaningful life. Illuminating each person’s strengths and virtues increases their happiness.
Happiness requires more than simply experiencing positive affective states. To fully experience happiness – "the good life" - one must deploy and exercise their personal strengths. The more correct question for governing one’s direction in life is not just "How can I be happy?’ but rather the question "What is the good life?"
"The good life" is found through the identification and use of each person’s individual strengths.
My Growing Interest
Several years ago, I became intrigued with the notion of leading with my strengths and not trying to correct my weakness. I was fairly aware of my weaknesses – I have no sense of direction, my math skills are terrible, and I don’t feel comfortable at cocktail parties or acting on stage – to name a few.
Trouble was, I was not sure of what my strengths were. I thought I was good at academics but I had a suspicion (as most people do) that any day now ‘they" were going to discover that I really was not that good after all.
I came across Marcus Buckingham and Donald Clifton’s work presented in their book Now, Discover Your Strengths. They had been doing some work with the Gallup organization and had developed an online assessment tool to help identify personal strengths. Here is an updated version of the book that you need to buy before you can take the assessment.
I took their StrengthFinder assessment and it revealed my unarticulated strengths. Strengths I had - but had not recognized.
My top 5 strengths from StrengthFinder turned out to be:
Intellection
People strong in the Intellection theme are characterized by their intellectual activity. They are introspective and appreciate intellectual discussions.
Strategic
People strong in the Strategic theme create alternative ways to proceed. Faced with any given scenario, they can quickly spot relevant patterns and issues.
Learner
People strong in the Learner theme have a great desire to learn and want to continuously improve. In particular, the process of learning, rather than the outcome, excites them.
Relater
People who are strong in the Relater theme enjoy close relationships with others. They find deep satisfaction in working hard with friends to achieve a goal.
Futuristic
People strong in the Futuristic theme are inspired by the future and what could be. They inspire others with their visions of the future.
My Strengths Revelation
I was both surprised and relieved. I always knew that intellection and learner were part of who I was – however, I never really thought about them as strengths. They were just always there - and now I could really own them.
I was completely surprised about the strengths strategic and futuristic. They seem like such "grown up" strengths that I had a secret ambition to strive for but thought I was too "soft" to be good at.
Relator – I was happy that at least I had one strength that had something to do with people rather than just ideas – since I have worked with people all of my life.
As I was getting into developing and leveraging my StrengthFinder strengths, the Values in Action project began. The Values In Action (VIA) Project, under the direction of Christopher Peterson, had begun its search for human characteristics that are accepted cross-culturally and are stable across situations and across time.
My strengths revealed by the VIA strength survey were:
Curiosity and interest in the world
"You are curious about everything. You are always asking questions, and you find all subjects and topics fascinating. You like exploration and discovery."
Creativity, ingenuity, and originality
"Thinking of new ways to do things is a crucial part of who you are. You are never content with doing something the conventional way if a better way is possible."
Judgment, critical thinking, and open-mindedness
"Thinking things through and examining them from all sides are important aspects of who you are. You do not jump to conclusions, and you rely only on solid evidence to make your decisions. You are able to change your mind."
Love of learning
"You love learning new things, whether in a class or on your own. You have always loved school, reading, and museums-anywhere and everywhere there is an opportunity to learn."
Perspective (wisdom)
"Although you may not think of yourself as wise, your friends hold this view of you. They value your perspective on matters and turn to you for advice. You have a way of looking at the world that makes sense to others and to yourself."
Almost immediately upon discovering my strengths, my whole perception of myself began to rework itself. I claimed my strengths and went forward in the world to learn (the learner) how to use my strengths in as many ways as I could. I set about to develop and nourish my strengths and use them consciously in all the aspects of my life.
To my continual surprise, I noticed myself consistently approaching life from at least one of my strengths instead of being hesitant or holding myself back, I began to relax into using the strength. Amazingly the strength would unfold and I would see myself doing all kinds of things that I never thought I had the predilection for.
As this went on, I became increasingly comfortable with myself. My fears about being revealed as a fraud disappeared. For the first time in my life I truly felt naturally congruent and authentic – I did not have to convince myself – it just was. I felt that I was acquiring a natural mastery.
Giving Up My Weaknesses
The other great thing that happened is that I stopped trying to correct my weaknesses.
One of the strengths defined on the StrengthFinder assessment is the strength of Woo. Those strong in this strength enjoy winning people over and getting them to like them. Woo people like meeting new people and strangers are rarely intimidating to them.
I have never been comfortable being a Woo person. But to succeed in business you are told that you need to get out there and be a Woo person. I spent a lot of energy trying to make myself get out there and meet new people. I forced myself and I got good at it – but it never really flowed easily for me - and it had a lot of hidden energy expenses in it for me. It was hard to make myself move against my natural flows of energy.
Now that I knew my strengths, I could give up Wooing people. Instead I nourish and develop my strength of being able to relate to other people – which I like doing a lot more and which comes naturally to me with no hidden costs.
My Top Strength
Another interesting thing I learned about myself had to do with my top strength - Curiosity - as revealed by the VIA assessment. Not only is curiosity my top strength but I also am in the 100th percentile of all categories of people who have curiosity as one of their strengths.
This means I am as far out there as you can get in terms of being curious.
Suddenly it explained many things about me. Like:
- How come I am attracted to getting tons of certifications (it was not pathological after all)
- Why I can never settle on just one interest and am always wanting to do many different things
- Why I always have to be involved in multiple projects in order to feel productive
- Why every time I got an idea about something (every second of the day) I felt compelled to try and make it happen.
It became clear to me that this strength– curiosity - had been over used and become a weakness for me. You know, "curiosity killed the cat". Well for me, curiosity could drive me to distraction and undo my focus. A strength over developed and not used in conjunction with your other strengths can become your weakness.
I now know that every brilliant idea that comes into my head is not a message that needs to be followed. It is just my natural curiosity doing its job and I can pick and choose what to follow up on. I am still curious about most everything – but a lot more relaxed.
What this has to do with you:
Identify your strengths – Take the StrengthFinder assessment <http://www.strengthfinder.com> and the VIA survey <http://www.authentichappiness.com>
Nourish, develop, and leverage your strengths in all the areas of your life and you will:
Be happier
Be and feel more authentic and genuine
Develop a new and more appreciative perception of yourself
Stop trying to correct your weakness and save yourself lots of hidden energy costs
Be able to see how your worst weakness can actually be the outcome of using your top strength without balancing it with your other strengths. From there, you can naturally let that weakness take its place in the constellation of your other strengths
Get things done more efficiently and with less effort because you are riding along on your own flow channels
Experience a sense of natural mastery and excellence because you are being naturally authentic and leveraging your best self.
Are You Leading with Your Strengths?
- I know my strengths and I can name them.
- I am comfortable with my strengths.
- I know how to develop and nourish my strengths.
- I know how to use my strengths in every area of my life.
- I know my weaknesses and I can name them.
- I can see how my greatest weakness is tied to my greatest strength.
- I know how to compensate for my weaknesses,
If you answered "no" to any of the above you could benefit from knowing more about your personal strengths and how to use them for more success, mastery and happiness in life. I would love to speak with you about how to do this.
Science says that there is a simple formula for experiencing success, mastery and happiness in life: Use your personal strengths every day in every way in all the main realms of your life and this will lead you to the experience of happiness, gratification and satisfaction. Use your personal strengths in the service of something larger than your personal life and this will lead you to experience the meaningful life.
If you would like to learn more about your personal strengths and how to leverage them in your life, speak with me about options that are available for you to do this. Contact me at maryann@evenstaronline.com or 434 – 263-4996.
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© Copyright 1997 - 2008 by Mary Ann Copson and Evenstar. All rights reserved.
About the Author:
Mary Ann Copson is the founder of the Evenstar Mood & Energy Wellness Center for Women. With Master's Degrees in Human Development and Psychology and Counseling, Mary Ann is a Certified Licensed Nutritionist; Certified Holistic Health Practitioner; Brain Chemistry Profile Clinician; and a Health, Wellness and Lifestyle Coach. Reconnect to your physical, emotional, mental, psychological and spiritual natural rhythms at
http://evenstaronline.com
